Lyrics

(IRAS)
I HAD MY RAZOR SHARPENED
AND THE TOWELS AND WATER STEAMING HOT,
WHEN I HEARD VOICES COMING,
PLANNING AN ASSASSINATION PLOT.
I OVERHEARD THE DETAILS,
A PLAN FOR AN ATTACK.
INSTEAD OF STEPPING FORWARD,
I TOOK A FEW STEPS BACK.
I LISTENED BY THE DOORWAY,
MAKING CERTAIN I WAS NOT IN VIEW.
THEY SPOKE OF WHICH WAY
THEY WOULD KILL THE VICTIM,
BUT I WONDERED WHO?
PUT POISON IN A BEVERAGE,
AN ACCIDENTAL FALL,
A SNAKE UNDER A PILLOW,
OR HIT `EM IN THE SKULL?
AND THEN HE CALLED ME,
HE SAID, “WHERE IS SHE?
“SHE SHOULD ALREADY BE HERE!”
AND I WAS WORRIED
IT WOULD LOOK FISHY
TO SUDDENLY APPEAR
IN FRONT OF THE VIZIER.
I TIPPY TOED ACROSS THE CARPETING
AS QUIET AS A CAT.
THEN I WENT OUT OVER THE WINDOW SILL
JUST LIKE AN ACROBAT.
I SNUCK BACK THROUGH A WINDOW,
INTO ANOTHER HALL,
AND THEN I JUST PRETENDED
I DIDN’T HEAR THE CALL.
I STARTED SINGING,
I STARTED HUMMING:
TAZKARA, TAZKARA,
FEIN MUMKEN ASHTARI ASHAARA ALF
TILL I WAS CERTAIN
THEY HEARD ME COMING
I SMILED AS I ENTERED,
AND BOWED WITH GREAT RESPECT.
THEN WITH A STEADY HAND
I BEGAN TO SHAVE HIS NECK.


AFTER I FINISHED AND THE VIZIER LEFT,
I WASN’T FAR BEHIND.
THERE WERE ACCOMPLICES,
BUT IT WAS CLEAR
HE WAS THE MASTERMIND.
I HID WITHIN THE SHADOWS,
TO HEAR THE THINGS HE SAID.
AND THEN HE FINALLY STATED
THE ONE HE WANTED DEAD.
I KNEW THE QUESTION,
I HAD THE ANSWER,
AND THE DETAILS IN BETWEEN!
SO IF YOU WONDER,
NOW THAT I’M DONE, SIR,
EXACTLY WHO I MEAN...
I SUGGEST YOU ASK THE QUEEN.